But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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