The maid of honor just puked.
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
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