were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
Randomize
