OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
she peed on how many people?
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
The power of my boobs compel you
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
Randomize
