We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
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