So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
I just found little boats floating in my bathtub....they are made out of white castle boxes, condoms, pickles, and corks. All the wine we bought is being used as the "ocean"....clearly we didn't drink any of the wine.....but I don't remember doing this.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
Randomize
