I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
I mean I feel like if you explain to the emoji app company that your friend got plastered and fell to the ground and is trying to scheme her way back to normal life and get her dignity back they would understand just how necessary it is to have a fingers crossed emoji...
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
