whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
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