my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
You wrote me a check. For zero dollars. For my soul. Dick.
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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