so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
checking your phone to see who you drunk dialed last night isnt as funny when you see you had a 17 minute call to your dad.
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
Let's be real. I'm the Usain Bolt of running away after hookups. Fastest (wo)man alive.
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
Randomize
