AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
In a bar surrounded by couples hooking up. I'm just staring at one. Not drunk enough. Come save me.
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
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