He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
Randomize
