u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
My balls are so social today.
Lucky for you, I found your phone.....Not so lucky for you, it was in the bottom of your vomit-filled trashcan.
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
I told him I thought I was pregnant and he told me he accidentally killed my bird.
Circle of life.
Randomize
