Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
His mom just asked me if I was "fooling around with her baby again" and then when I walked downstairs his dad YELLED "Look who's taking the walk of shame!"
You really need to stop fucking dudes who still live with their parents.
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
