so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
If he eats mayonnaise, he's not getting laid. End of story.
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Randomize
