I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
theres a note on the fridge that says "guess what i peed in" and a half-full bottle of apple juice front and center. why did you let him in the house?
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
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