we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
Yeah when we were together he never sent me dick pics like a normal boyfriend. It was always pizzas. That should've been my sign.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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