I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
I woke up at 5am on my couch, naked, with a cereal bowl of water next to me. Apprently, drunk me thought I was a kitten last night. Super impressed I slept next to the bowl all night and didn't spill a drop.
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