sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
I made out with a guy who was dressed as Borat
And like a minute in, I was like oh fuck what am I doing
Did you run away?
I DANCED AWAY.
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
What part of “the stripper has a gun, we need to leave” is confusing you? She’s drunk, she’s fucking crazy and NOW SHE’S PACKING HEAT!
Randomize
