ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Randomize
