No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
Randomize