Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
Just heard my neighbor say "I'm just gonna lay down in a coma until someone comes into my room and hands me a beer." He's got his priorities straight
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
Randomize
