dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
Im too awkward for one night stands. I need to hire someone to come clear them out of my bed before I wake up.
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
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