it wasn't lemon gatorade
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
OH MY GOD MY UBER DRIVER IS PEEING BEHIND A DUMPSTER
Still got in the car though
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
Randomize
