Are we in a gay sports bar?
Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
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