Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
Duuuude. Everything is so brilliant right now. This frosting is freaking orgasmic.
It's vanilla, man. Accept no substitutes. There are so many t's in that word.
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
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