Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
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