in the event that i am dead, my body is laying in the intersection of ... the pearl in springfield. it was my friend's 21st but i think i'm dead. wearing a black top. like i said, probably dead.
a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
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He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
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Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling