real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
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