He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
i wish my penis had a tongue
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
You ever have a fart follow you around?
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