Pants 0. Shit 1.
oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
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