Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
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