You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
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