i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
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