Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
I was gonna be Romantic and write your name in emoji eggplants but A's are hard
Randomize
