She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
God gave him joint rollers for hands
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
Got out of the uber to projectile vomit in the McDonald's drive thru. Gonna take a break from the Cuervo for a while.
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
Randomize
