so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Randomize
