I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
He was actually surprised when I poured myself a glass full of straight vodka. Clearly he doesn't know me as well as he thinks.
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