we'll go far in life on tits alone.
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
Randomize
