Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
So, I woke up to an empty bottle of scotch and a dead car. The last thing I remember are the strippers being mad at me. Awesome night.
Feels good to be wearing underwear again though...
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
Randomize
