Me too!
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize