I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
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