After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
Randomize
