am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
Randomize
