I'm gonna have a badass scar
My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Randomize
