Are we in a gay sports bar?
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
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