You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
Randomize
