Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
Is it penis luge time yet?
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
So then we ended up at a bar full of navy SEALs and I got one of them to take his shirt off, then I felt him up
I feel like 31-year old me is 21-year old me's hero
Really need a jack off emoji
Who do we write to about that?
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
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