so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
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