Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
Im at a strip club, and the dancer just farted into my face. The bad part about that is I could taste the wings I bought her earlier
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
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