So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
I think I sprained my soul last night
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
I'm sexting with a 20 year old that has a foot fetish... This is what Sailor Jerry drives me to do.
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
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